April 5, 2012

Teagan's Spring Flower

Looking back on the year so far, I’ve done pretty well with my heretofore unstated challenge for writing a Post a Day.  But lately I’ve been feeling that I’m reaching for material to write about.  That it’s becoming a chore and not something I want to do.  Something I like to do.  I don’t think I’m improving my writing, but writing for posting’s sake.

I’m glad I’ve done it though.  I have some posts I know I’ll go back to as time passes.  Some moments that I’m glad I recorded, even with my mediocre writing.

So, maybe it’s time to stop the daily posts.  I will still post…  this has been a sort of journal of mine for over six years.  There will be so many little bits of life I won’t want to forget, so many cute things that the girls will do that I won’t want to forget.  So many things I’ll want to share.  If I don’t write them down, I know I will forget.  They’ll fade.

And then I won’t have lovely things to embarrass them with when they get older.  I wonder how many times I can post pictures of their bums or them picking their nose or a video of them farting.  Maybe just sharing their artwork, or simply posting a picture of them sleeping.

Everyone loves a baby sleeping, don’t they?

Ashlin sleeping hard at day care

 

March 29, 2012

Tower

So, my baby turns one today.  I can’t believe it’s been a full year already.  It zoomed by in the blink of a bleary eye.  I was a bit bittersweet this morning watching her eat gold fish (and toast, and cheese, and fruit, and, and…), knowing I was sending her off to day care today, sad that I wasn’t going to be spending the day with her.  But, I got over that bit of sadness quickly.  She was home yesterday, and will be home with me tomorrow.  But the melancholy of today being her birthday is still there.

She’s grown so much, changed so much from the little (big!) peanut I had to wait to hold.  It’s been a year of challenges, for both of us.  She’s overcome so many of them.  At first it was her breathing and glucose levels.  Then it was the possibility of  hip dysplasia, thanks to her being breech for so long.  Then she was caught in the PKU screening, then nursing too much, and refluxing.  Not nursing enough, losing weight. And losing more weight.  Throwing up and almost needing to be tested for pyloric stenosis, a bout of croup, an ear infection, rash, allergic reaction, and another more impressive rash.  Stomach flu with severe dehydration, which lead to two ER visits, with an IV for fluids during the second one.  Sleeping through the night.

Swinging Birthday Girl!

No, wait.  She hasn’t overcome that yet, still up at least once, usually twice a night.  Though she will sleep around four or five hours in a stretch now.  More, if she’s been stuffed with macaroni and cheese, saltines and gold fish.

But there were good things that happened too.  Her first smile, her first laugh.  The huge laughs that Teagan can get from her, the way she looks at Teagan, and Teagan at her.  Her first party, staying up to see the Royal Wedding.  Many walks on the beach.  Rolling over, finally getting out of the swaddle.  Finally saying Mama. Standing.  Crawling.  Cruising.  Supported walking.  It’s all going by so fast.She loves imitating you, putting things on her head, playing peek-a-boo, talking on the phone.

She will say LaLa now, and NayNay, though her preferred word is still DaDa.

She gives hugs.  When being rocked to sleep, she wants to be up, with her head on your shoulder, snuggled in, instead of reclined in your arms.  She loves her glowing seahorse, and will usually go down easily, though still doesn’t stay down all night.

She’s got five teeth now, all came up within the past six weeks.  At least three more are just waiting to break through.

She sits back and watches, happy to be on the side lines.  If she wants attention she will ask – cry – for it, unlike her sister, who will be a dancing monkey for any attention.

~~

I had this post open, revising it, adding to it, all day.  Maybe to keep my baby in mind today.  To hold her a bit longer.  I know the time she allows me to hold her is limited.  She’s going to grow up so fast, and want to run, run, as soon as she can walk.

I am looking forward to finding out who she will be as she grows older.

February 13, 2012

bbbbbbettahhhhh

She’s doing so much better today.  My brave girl.  The IV did help.

Her morning diaper was soaked.  Drenched.  A total flood like we haven’t seen in days.  Yay!  She nursed well, was in a good mood, a better mood than she’s been in lately.  So nice to see her back.  We hadn’t realized how reduced, how diminished she was.  She usually shines brighter than she has been.

Instructions from the ER docs on discharge were to make sure she drinks 30ml ever hour she’s awake.  If she has any diarrhea, then to add an additional 20ml.

Most of the day was spent trying to get fluid into her and waiting for a wet diaper.  Waiting for the Tinkle Fairy, as someone said.  We only got two slightly damp diapers.  Not too bad, after the morning heavy.  We also got two poopsplosions.   Great.  More fluid to try to get back into her.

Force-feeding her pedialyte through a syringe is not fun.  She won’t take it any other way, unless she’s thirsty and sleeping.  You have to hold her arms down and put the syringe in, forcing her to swallow.  Most will go in, some escapes.  She fights, she cries.  I hate making her cry.

At least now, when she cries, she can make tears.  Watching her cry, and not having any tears just tore my heart in two.

Stu and I were only able to get about 100ml into her.  We should have given her about 200ml.  Now, since she did nurse, and nursed several times today, that reduces the total amount needed.  But we still didn’t get enough into her.  She’ll be in day care tomorrow, and they’ll need to try to get her to drink, too.  She’ll get four 90ml bottles of breast milk, so that should make up the bulk of what she’ll need.

Hopefully, it will all go well.  I’m a little anxious about it.

Oh.  And she’ll say “mama” now, and mean me.  She doesn’t just say it when she’s crying and wants me.  Pretty cool.

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February 10, 2012

Do I look sick to you?

Today’s episode in Ashlin’s ongoing saga of disease and pestilence is brought to you by dehydration.  As the on-call doctor suggested last night, I called first thing and got her an appointment.  By the time we got there at 11:00, she had only had one wet diaper, her morning diaper.  She also had been very fussy in the morning.

So, she’s lost at least two-thirds of a pound in a week.  Her earsdrums are still red, but not bulging.  The doctor didn’t want to prescribe another round of antibiotics – omnicef – as Ashlin already has diaper issues thanks to the amoxicillian and then the zithromycin.  Not sure if her tummy issue, she hasn’t puked since yesterday, is from them too.

So, we were told to push pedialyte and breastmilk.  To even use a syringe to get more fluid into her.  The doctor initially wanted at least one wet diaper by 3pm.  We didn’t have a wet diaper by 3pm.  She did wet one, sort of, by 4pm.  Doctor wasn’t totally happy, but as Ashlin is mostly herself, we should wait and see tomorrow.  If she starts acting odd over night, we were to call the on-call doctor.

So, to start a third paragraph the same way, we are waiting to see how she does.  She had a barely wet diaper, one not worth changing around 5pm, and a dry diaper at bed time.  She nursed a bit, and then fell asleep pretty easily.  She’s been a bit restless, but not bad.

I just want my normally happy girl to be better.

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January 3, 2012

What's in here?

Today we had Ashlin’s nine month well-baby visit.  She is going great! Doctor was pleased with her, her weight gain, milestone progress.

Ashlin now weighs in at 17 pounds, up from 14 pounds at six months.  Up from the 10th percentile to something “between 10th and 20th percentiles” according to the doctor.  But, she was happy with that gain.  No need to test poopy diapers, feed the baby butter, or make her eat in the middle of the night, or really worry much more.  Yes, she’s small, but she’s gained enough weight to not worry about failure to thrive.  That’s so good to hear!  I blame it on the macaroni and cheese, and the french toast, and the sausage casserole, and the lasagna.

The rest of the stats were good.  Height is now 27.75 inches, up from 25.25 inches, but holding at 50th percentile.  She has a big noggin, 46 cm (90th percentile) up from 43.6 cm (75th).

So, good visit.  Whew!

As you can see, she’s getting into things, even though she’s not crawling yet.  She still can move around in her space.  She can’t be deterred, she wants go explore.

November 1, 2011

Ashlin does have croup. It was not an easy night, though I – we – got some sleep. Even Ashlin got some sleep.

She was sounding so bad, even in the morning, that I called the doctor for an appointment. We got in first thing, thankfully. It is croup. We need to watch her breathing, and as long as she isn’t having too much difficulty, we can avoid both the hospital and steroids.

In weight news, she’s up nine ounces. Yay!

September 12, 2011 ~ Day Care Update, Part II

I'm not a problem

Today was Ashlin’s second day in day care.  It was better and worse than her first.  She napped, and played and smiled.  She, however, did not take a bottle.  Not really.

I got a call around noon today, asking what we did to get her to take a bottle.  Um…  breastfeed her?  I’m such a wise-ass in my brain.  We were bad over the weekend, and didn’t work on it.  Why make her cry if we don’t need to?  Well, we probably do need to, as she does need to eat during the day.  But it’s just so much easier, much less frustrating for her and for us, to just breastfeed her.  Sigh.  Mom fail.

Instead, I say that although we try, we never have been very successful.  I do mention that I sent in two types of nipples, one regular medela one and one that looks like her pacifier nipple.  I had told this to the morning instructor, and asked that she let me know which worked best, and that I could send all the bottles in with that nipple.  I guess that message hadn’t been relayed.

By noon she had drunk only 30ml – 1oz – since 6:30.  Not really enough.  She’d be cranky when they tried to feed her, but when the stopped, she’d be all smiles.  She played, she giggled, she napped.

By 4:30, she had taken a total of 60ml – 2oz.

Stu and I left early to get her – so I could nurse her.  The afternoon instructor said that she had done better with the pacifier type nipple, although she only took 30ml.  I told her I’d try a bottle at home tomorrow, and that I’d send in bottles with that nipple from now on.

I hope this stubborn baby changes her mind about bottles.  Soon.

September 8, 2011 ~ Day Care Update

Around lunch time, I ended up calling day care to see how Ashlin was holding up.  (I was concerned about whether she took a bottle or not.  Really.  It wasn’t because I missed her.  Really).

Turns out that she was doing ok, though not having a spectacular start to her day care experience.  She did nap off and on most of the morning, in the swing and in her crib.  By the time that all the naps were over, it had been about 4 hours since Ashlin had last eaten, so she was a bit cranky.  They hadn’t wanted to wake her, as she was getting used to the new environment.  So, cranky baby who doesn’t really like bottles?  It didn’t go too well, she ended up taking 2oz over an hour, really making the instructor work for it.  I was pretty happy she took something.

When I walked in to pick her up, she was in the swing, crying.  According to the afternoon instructor, she had just started that minute.  A few minutes before she had been playing and smiling.  Ashlin loved their play-gym mat, and the excersaucer they have (theirs rocks too).  She also really enjoyed the swing.  They had tried to give the second bottle, but Ashlin didn’t want any of it, but was obviously hungry.  Poor baby.

I go get her sister and get home to nurse my baby.  Ashlin is obviously tired, as her nap schedule has been thrown off by the new place, new sounds, new people.  Today may not have been the best day to start her, as there were three instructors today, where usually there are only two.  They’re sure that next time, Ashlin will do better, not that she did all that badly today.  She will get used to taking bottles, and sleeping in a new place with new people and new sounds.

I’ll get used to it too.

September 8, 2011

Where am I?

The day started off ok – well, ok enough for a first day back at work.  Up early to shower and get dressed, then downstairs to the coffee my husband made me.  A moment with e-mail and news to enjoy the coffee.  Back up to dry my hair and finish getting ready.

The babies cooperated as well.  Ashlin was quietly waiting for me to go get her out of her crib to nurse.  What a huge smile she gave me when she finally noticed me peeking over the crib.  Almost made me forget about the screaming and crying at 2:30am.  She was a hungry baby!

Stu came up after a bit to wake Teagan up.  She woke up in a sweet mood too.  So nice when she does, makes you want to play with her all day when she’s cute and sweet like that.  She asked for two piggy tails, please.  Sure thing, sweetness!

Kiss please, mommy!

I comb Teagan’s hair while Stu brings all the bags (OMG!  So many bags!) out to the car.  He was working from home thanks to early conference calls and training, so I was the one to take the girls to day care.

Teagan was a big help too, she carried in Ashlin’s bottles of milk, and held my hand, while I had the baby in the infant seat and her bag of diapers, wipes and clothes.  I forgot how much stuff you need to bring to day care for a little baby.

First Day

I leave Ashlin and all her stuff by the door to the infant room and walk Teagan to her section of the big room – the big Two’s!  So exciting that mommy is dropping her off.  She has to tell everyone that I’m her mommy – “My mommy!  Teagan’s mommy!”  She’s also excited that her sister is going to be there too and shouting about “Ashlin, right dere!”   She asks for a kiss before I go and get Ashlin settled.  Yay!  I hope she always asks for a kiss before we say goodbye for the day.

Ashlin was a bit more subdued than her older sister.  Curious and confused at first, not sure what was going on.  I give the instructor the quick run down – she sleeps swaddled best, she’s on a routine that’s not quite two hours between naps, three hours between feedings, watch out! she rolls all over, sits well when supported, and can do a tripod sit on her own for about 15 seconds now, she’s grabby and will look for dropped toys, but usually in a good mood and smiles a lot.  I mention that she’s breastfed, so hasn’t gotten many bottles.  As I hand my baby to the instructor, Ashlin breaks down into tears.  I know she doesn’t understand.  I give my baby a big hug and kiss. I don’t cry.  I tell the instructor to call me if there are any issues, and I leave my baby.

It wasn’t easy.  I didn’t cry, although I did get very close. <sigh>

When I got into the car, Melt With You was playing on the radio.  Warm and happy thoughts tried to overcome the sadness.  I missed my baby.

BTW, work sucked.

June 6, 2011 ~ Ashlin’s Stats

Bored Now

Forgot to update with Ashlin’s Two Month Doctor’s Appointment.

She’s grown!

At birth she weighed 7lbs 11oz, she’s now 11lbs 2oz.  That puts her in the 50-55th percentile.  Her height went from 19.25 inches to 22.5.  Again 50-55th percentile.  Head circumference is now 40 cm – 80th percentile!  OMG!

She’s doing well all around – nursing, growing, sleeping.  Sleeping like a dream!  She will give you a big smile, one that lights up her eyes, and makes her pull up her arms like she’s the cutest.  She sticks her tongue out, tries to play the game often.  She’s almost laughing, the proto-laugh is getting more and more like a real laugh.  She’s beginning to interact with toys, though that’s still in it’s very early stages.

She does get fussy – gassy – every now and then.  Very not fun when she’s crying and everything you do doesn’t help.  Thankfully, it’s not too often, maybe once or twice a week or so.  Not every day.  Not every night.  Sometimes gas drops help, but unfortunately not always.  Sometimes the swing helps and that’s good.